Hackneyed in its
conception, Bob Favourite’s RIVERBOAT
MAMA (1969) is about as cheap as they get, which is immediately
demonstrated by credits handwritten on the backs of numerous publicity photos
of the film’s top-heavy star Morganna, billed hereon as “Morgana, The Wild
One.” Through the use of some amusing—if
wearisome—narration, we learn that “Many years back, somewhere along the ol’
Mississippi, an ol’ river rat by the name of Matt Blackjack [Art Schill] and his sidekick Moon”
didn’t just haul “grain for farmers as such”, but captured girls along the way
and then hauled them “forcefully up the river to sell to the gamblers and
settlers.”
While trekking through
the muddy marshlands, Maude (Morganna) hitches a ride on Matt’s illicit
riverboat, because she’s (quote) “tired of workin’ over yonder!” unaware of
Matt’s true cargo, which includes three women whom Moon kidnapped earlier
(“They some fine specimens!”). After sampling the goods and revealing
Morgana’s ginormous mammaries—which wouldn’t be out of place in any of Russ
Meyer’s top-heavy tit-pics—Matt bursts into a li’l ditty:
“Muddy Maude, she makes my heart quiver / Muddy Maude, she lives up the river.”
Maude soon realizes
what’s really happening and organizes a revolt with the other captives, which
consists of ‘smothering’ Moon and stealing his guns. Once liberated, the girls turn the place into
a showboat, and for what seems like an eternity, they stand around modeling all
sorts of dresses (“You got big boobs!”), a sequence which is shot with a
painful lack of imagination in a single poorly-blocked camera set-up. Continuing on upriver—with apparently no one at
the helm of the boat!—the charismatic capitalists in search of (quote) “men and
money” have no qualms about gettin’ down and dirty for a little greenback; that is, until Tim Sweetbreath (Chuck
Davis)—who wears one of the most ridiculous blond wigs ever—becomes smitten
with Maude (“You’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life!”). However, just when (quote) “Maude thought
everything was comin’ up roses, Matt and Moon were comin’ back to claim their
boat!”
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| Maude (Morganna) organizing a revolt with the other women. |
Morganna (a.k.a. Morganna
Roberts) was an exotic dancer and entertainer who is probably better-known to
most mainstream audiences as the infamous “Kissing Bandit” who rushed onto baseball
fields throughout the ’70s, where she attempted to put the smooch on any number
of popular baseball players. Her ample
proportions were always, shall we say, at the (ahem) “forefront” of her career, and director Bob Favourite
definitely uses that as his prime selling point with this poverty-stricken
production. While dramatically sluggish,
RIVERBOAT MAMA does feature ample requisite
nudity—including some quite risqué shots for ’69—with copious shots of
Morganna’s disproportionately busty figure, and much like Favourite’s INDIAN RAID INDIAN MADE (1969; also
starring Morganna), it’s mostly played for laughs, but these come few and far
between indeed. Art Schill, who appeared
in all three of Favourite’s films—including his Florida-lensed THE BRIDES WORE BLOOD (1972)—is, at the
very least, somewhat memorable based solely on his “Muddy Maude” song, which he
sings twice in the film! On the other
hand, Chuck Davis, another Favourite favorite, is downright silly as the Jethro
“Golly”-type hillbilly, who does get to bed the title heroine, then proceeds to
have one of the lamest post-coital fights with Matt without ever even getting
out of the sack!
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| Maude (Morganna - on the left) taking over the boat! |
Released by Harry Novak
and his Box Office International Pictures with the usual hyperbole (“From bayou
bitch to Mississippi Queen!”), RIVERBOAT
MAMA definitely falls far short of Harry’s other, more infamous cornpone /
hicksploitation films. Despite taking
place on a riverboat (provided by David Friedline), providing the film with the
barest of production values, the piecemeal set decorations, which are
supposedly the interior of the boat, are especially penniless, consisting of a
few tables and the occasional bed(s), and make Byron Mabe’s SPACE THING (1968) seem positively
state-of-the-art by comparison! Unimaginatively
shot with bland, static camera set-ups, Bob Huntley’s photography only adds to
the film’s sluggish pace, while the customary banjo-and-zither score just
meanders along like the rest of the film.
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| Matt Blackjack (Art Schill) singing' his l'il ditty, Muddy Maude! |
RIVERBOAT MAMA—sometimes referred to as MUDDY MAMA—was released onto DVD-R by Something Weird Video, and
like the rest of their Harry Novak catalogue is now, unfortunately, out-of-print. Presented fullscreen, the film has all the
usual scratches, occasional missing frames and other filmic debris, but is certainly
watchable enough. The 76-minute film
appears to be complete, and as usual, SWV has filled their DVD-R with all sorts
of trailers (including many Harry Novak ones) and promotional material, which
includes Fredric Hobbs’ ROSELAND (1971),
Nate Rodgers’ TANYA (“A grueling
life of discipline and fear. And camaraderie!”, 1976), Frederick R. Friedel’s KIDNAPPED COED (1976) and Bethel
Buckalew’s cornpone classics, TOBACCO
ROODY (1970), COUNTRY CUZZINS
(1970), The PIGKEEPER’S DAUGHTER (1972) and SASSY SUE (1973). These are followed by promotional spots such
as “Shock Stock”, “Go-Go Burlesque”, “Geeks and Freaks”, Cool Cats”, “Monsters,
Muscles and Mayhem”, “Wild, Wasted and Delinquent” and “The Manly, The Macho
and Southern Sleaze”, which just about highlight most of SWV’s catalogue.
